Captivating

I know I've blogged about this book before, but something is making me mention it again. These next few days are going to be a little...trying for me. The whole youth group is at CFAW in Virginia while I'm at home (working) and wishing I was there with them. This has been causing a lot of doubt and fear to take hold in me - thoughts of the future, where I'm going to go, and what I'm going to do. I'm scared - terrified!!!!

Yet I know God has not given me a "spirit that makes you a slave again to fear" (Romans 8:15), but the "Spirit of sonship." Fear is a sin, because it undermines God's sovereignty and greatness. When we fear, we are not putting faith in our awesome and amazing God, but rather choosing to be afraid of the future. For although we don't know what is planned for our lives, we can trust that it will be in God's hands.

When I read this book a few months ago, it changed something in me. It awakened a desire to live a life completely sold out for Him. Unfortunately, since it was a library book, I had to return it, so I didn't get much time to reflect on what I had learned. I knew, however, that God wanted me to continue discovering, so I went to the Christian bookstore and bought my own copy.

Over the next twelve days, I am going to be reading the book chapter by chapter, letting everything sink in. I want to change, to be more like Jesus, to have have a heart that is fully His. I want to be satisfied, to have a joy that transcends earthly circumstances, and to love Him with everything I have. God calls me captivating - and I want nothing more than to live as if I believed that to be true.