Thankful for Kids

It's been a crazy week here at UofT. In a good way. Every single morning I am so excited to get out of bed and face what God has put before me. I have no idea what people I'm going to meet or what blessing He will pour onto me. It's a beautiful adventure.
Volunteering on Monday was...trying. I'm really sensitive and emotional, especially when it comes to kids. And these children have...nothing. I want so badly to hold them and help them, to give them the beautiful things in life that they probably have no idea about. Walking through a shopping mall or even going to church, I see parents letting their kids play with iPods, Nintendo DS's, and cellphones. The kids I work with...well, they have cards. And jenga. And each other.
I learned this valuable lesson when Kaye presented me with a picture she had drawn me. "Here, this is for you." The picture is now on my wall, a reminder that you don't have to be rich to love, you don't need money to give people gifts. Markers and a piece of paper will suffice.

Thankful for Love

I have been overwhelmed with God's love over the past few weeks. More and more, I have been showered with His affection and goodness towards me. I feel like I'm caught in a rain shower of the divine that is quenching my thirst for more of Him.

I see His love through my breakup with Joel. How He stepped in and comforted me when I was hurting. How He sent people my way to love on me. How He held me in His arms and gave me hope.

I see His love in the children I tutor. The way their eyes sparkle with hope and joy. The way they lay a hand on my arm affectionately, craving love and comfort. The way God sent them to me, and me to them.

I see His love in the sky, the trees, my friends, my family, and perhaps most importantly, the cross. He sent Jesus to die for my sins, for the sins of the world, because He loved us so much.

Where would we be without God's unconditional, beautiful, and everlasting love? And now that we have that love, how are we responding to it? Do we share it with others, or do we keep it to ourselves? Do we reach out to those in need, or stay comfortable in our lives? A part of why God loves us is so that we can love others in turn.

Thank You, Lord, for Your love. You fill my heart with it and offer it to me unconditionally. Help me take Your love into the world that so desperately needs it. In Your precious name, Amen.

Living in the City

I know I've been MIA for quite some time. University, I'm finding, is fairly crazy. There's lots of reading, lots of people, and lots of fun. I've meet cute indie boys, an amazing group of friends, and sincere Christians.

Dealing with my breakup with Joel has been easy yet difficult. When I'm home for the weekend, memories flood me. I drive by the place where we had our first date, where our favourite restaurant was, and where I first told him I love him. So, I'm not a big fan of going home. I know it will get better with time. And while I'm here in the city, there's other, bigger things on my mind.

Tonight was my first night tutoring at the city mission. I'm paired with two grade one girls who have beautiful smiles and big hearts. And yet, they have so little...only a pencil in their pencil case, shirts that are wrinkled and stained, and dinner that consists of McDonald's. The mission isn't that well off, either. Their supplies are low, and they are wondering if they will even be able to give the children gifts and prizes this year since their income is based on donations.

Walking back from the mission, I passed by huge department stores and equally huge churches. I couldn't contain the tears. Everything is so upside down in this life, and what are we doing to change it? How come we are so eager to walk into a multi million dollar mega church but not spend our time with the poor and needy? To give our time, our gifts, our money?

I'm reading "Irresistible Revolution" right now by Shane Claiborne. One of the things he says in his book is..."I asked participants who claimed to be 'strong followers of Jesus' whether Jesus spent time with the poor. Nearly 80 percent said yes. Later in the survey, I sneaked in another question. I asked this same group of strong followers whether they spent time with the poor, and less than 2 percent said they did. I learned a powerful lesson: we can worship and admire Jesus without doing what He did.We can applaud what He preached and stood for without caring about the same things. We can adore his cross without taking up ours. I had come to see that the great tragedy of the Church is not that rich Christians don't care about the poor but that rich Christians do not know the poor."

Hm. Something to think about.

A Journey to Healing

Hey, blog friends and whoever may read this.

Please pray for me. My boyfriend of 9 months just broke up with me today, and I don't really know what to feel. I don't entirely agree with his decision, so I'm really hurt and confused right now. I felt that God wanted me to keep fighting and keep hoping. But - I couldn't. It's over now.

So, please pray for me as I trust God to heal me and hold me, and lead me in this situation.

University!

I move into University on Sunday! And the worst part is, I haven't even started packing yet!

I'm nervous, excited, skeptical, and hesitant all at the same time. I love where I am in life, and I don't want that to change. I love my friends and my family. I don't want us to grow apart.

But I know God has a plan for all of this. And I trust Him with my whole heart!